Friday, December 31, 2010

All things new

My thoughts are still scattered... not leaving the house for two weeks and waking every 2 hours will do that to you I guess. However I wanted to post on this last day of 2010.

I have never had such a full year. I say "full" not only in a positive and satisfied sense, but in a broken and humbled sense as well.

Many people have been posting their "year of statuses in 2010" on Facebook. This typically is pretty fun, but this year I am actually scared of it. What days will pop up? What pain will surface as those days are remembered even in such a simple exercise? And then I think about the amazing days. My year in statuses would be a full spectrum of emotion.

This year started with heartbreak and grief, deep darkness and despair and led that way through much of the year. Grief has been a dominant theme as I lost a baby and a close friend.

But the darkest of the pain and despair made ways for the brightness of His glory in the midst of my brokenness. I am convinced more than ever of God's goodness, grace, and faithfulness to me. My relationship with God has deepened as I continue to learn to depend on Him for all things and trust His plan for my life. Hope and expectancy of His return are deeply rooted in me.

This new year's eve I look back and I am grateful for every day of 2010 as much as it hurts to remember. I look forward to the new year and to the day when God will make all things new.

190. Darkness used by God to show His light.
191. God's faithfulness even when our hearts fail.
192. God's greatness and glory.
193. He holds every one of our tears in a jar.
194. God's compassion and mercy that comes to us and heals.
195. Immanuel-God with us.
196. Hope of heaven, our Home, where we were made for.
197. Life that he knit together in my womb. One who is in heaven, one newborn I kiss daily, and one big brother who is generous with hugs and kisses.
198. A growing big brother with a sweet spirit and an adventurous little boy's heart.
199. God's provision through my husbands hard work.
200. Deepening relationships and a community that I can depend on.
201. Fun trips throughout the year.
202. A husband who loves me and our family and continues to grow as a leader of our home.
203. All the details of life that have been cared for as I trust Him.
204. New books
205. New art and courage to create
206. New hobbies
207. That God's Word is trustworthy and true.

"Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.'

And he who was seated on the throne said, 'Behold, I am making all things new.' Also he said, 'Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.'" Revelation 21: 1-5

1 comment:

My Life as a Mom said...

Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the past year. It has been so neat to see God work through you this year. Praise God for the miracle of Matthew!

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